Wednesday, July 29, 2009

Villains

Every morning, when I read the papers, I can't help but think our country has a very formidable brood of villains. People are buying high-end SUVs while Teso starves.
Even if they had planned to buy them all along, they could have at least waited till the famine abates.

Then there's all the scam artists running around. They all have similar catchphrases.. "Want to make easy extra cash?" or "Need a well-paying job?" and so on. Why do people keep falling for the same tricks? People are entitled to their opinions.

I hear a whole town council fell for one clever scam. That was hillarious. Residents and authorities alike fell for it.

I wonder when our hero will arise. Whenever that is, I'm sure it will be at the precipice of this spiral towards anarchy.

Wednesday, July 8, 2009

Project: Stingray (Part 1)

Looks like I got a new hobby over the weekend. I now officially love swimming! It wasn't my first time, but it sure felt like it. The last time I had tried, I hadn't really succeeded.

Anyhow, this time around, I went with a trainer and 'cheerleader,' so i was being yelled at and shouted at. It was comforting.

I thought it was as obvious as it looks when I watch other people do it. I was almost right. I didn't consider the fact that having 3 instructors could complicate things further.

When you look like you're in a plight of sorts, it's amusing how people come to your rescue, each giving advice that's contrary to the other's. So, I tried each of their theories, but it's the 3rd guy's stuff that seemed to cover more groud (er..water).

Needless to say, in 30 minutes, i was as good at swimming as a dog. I hope to upgrade to a better mammal next time... perhaps an otter.

Friday, July 3, 2009

Attempted failure

For a moment, I thought I was gazing at the sunset. So awesome, so tender. So gentle and soothing. A reminder of all that's good in this life. And then, suddenly, she stood up.

It was then that I realised the futility of my planned 'ambush.' Now, the golden rule in approaching a lady is to do it within 3 seconds. That way, you don't have time to change your mind, or hesitate. She was fifteen seconds out, So you can guess what happened.

Anyway, I tried to be as bold as i could, but her beauty was/is breathtaking. I thought my heart was in my throat and my tongue had retreated to my gut.

I think I gasped, "Hi." She flicked her hair to one side and said, "Did you say something?"

I: I didn't. I just gasped.
She: Why? Is there something wrong?

I: As a matter of fact, there is.
She: Well, what is it?

I: I think it's a little unfair for all the beauty in this building to be concentrated in one body.

She: (Chuckles)
I: Yes, you guessed it. Hers.
She: Whose?! (Sounding somewhat distraught)

I: You didn't think I was talking about you, did you?
She: Of course not. (Liar!)

I: Very well then, it's been real nice praising another woman before you. But, you look very pretty yourself too.

She: Is that consolation?
I: I hope so. You may not find it anywhere else.

She: 'Hysterical laughter' I see you're trying to be funny.
I: I doubt that. Looks like I succeeded!

And then we exchanged contacts (not lenses), just like that. I bet she went home bragging like a peacock. I now know that sarcasm wins, every time!